Disclaimer

Information on this site is not legal advice, but general information on common legal issues. Law Forms Pro is not a law firm nor is it a substitute for a lawyer. Access and use of this site is subject to additional terms and conditions: Full Disclaimer

Divorce Do's and Don'ts

Divorce can be emotionally draining, difficult, and stressful, but during the period of your divorce it is more important than ever to pursue positive interactions and behaviors. The following collection of divorce "Do's" and "Don'ts" is designed to help you recognize and imitate positive behaviors, and to avoid behaviors that can negatively affect the outcome of your case.

What can I do for my children?
Divorce is especially hard on children, and it is important to remember that they still need stability and support-even if you feel like those elements are a little short in your own life.

• DO be as supportive as you can.
• DON'T make divorce the focus of your parent-child relationship
  
  If your son or daughter needs to talk about what's happening, be ready to listen and explain, but try not to turn every conversation toward the topic of divorce. As both you and your children will need some mental and social respite from the reality of divorce, focusing your conversation on other, unrelated topics can help ease the stress in both of your lives.
• DON'T abandon your relationship with your children if you've decided on divorce.
  
  It is painful for your children, and it spells disaster for your appearance in court. If the law decides that you've neglected your parental responsibilities, the court can severely limit or deny access to your children in the future.
• DO follow the guidelines of the separation agreement regarding your children.
  
  By adhering to rules of your custody and visitation arrangements, you will demonstrate your respect for the court and your family. Parents who violate or otherwise disregard these rules can negatively impact the court's final custody ruling.

How should I handle my relationship with my spouse?

• DO make an effort to communicate with your spouse.
  
  As difficult as it may be, talking to your spouse now can save you hours of legal frustration later on. If neither of you are speaking to one another, you'll inevitably make conflicting assumptions about certain aspects of your divorce. But by communicating early on (and often), you'll be able to map out a cleaner, cheaper divorce.
• DON'T be afraid to ask questions.
  
  Clarity is of utmost importance in a divorce, and keeping communications open with your spouse is only the beginning. You should also make sure that you bring up any concerns you have-- first with your attorney, and then with your spouse's attorney. There is nothing to be gained by remaining in the dark about a divorce.
• DON'T be closed to compromise.
  
  When you get down to the nuts and bolts of your settlement, you'll realize that you can't win in every instance. While you should never feel obligated to turn everything over to your spouse, you also shouldn't expect to walk away from your marriage unscathed. Experience has shown that compromising couples settle divorces more rapidly and for less money.

Other legal concerns:

• DO disclose all of your property and assets.
  
  Failure to disclose can cause your settlement to be thrown out, along with all of the time and money invested in reaching that settlement.
• DON'T try to marry someone else during the divorce.
  
  If you're in a "Fault" state especially, your actions can have a severe, negative impact on your settlement. Wait until your divorce has been settled and familiarize yourself with legal rights for second marriages.
• DON'T readjust or rearrange your assets.
  
  This is an immediate red flag for divorce courts and it can get you entrenched in even further legal action. "Gifting" property to relatives or friends falls under this heading as well. If you give property away to someone and arrange to recover it from them after the divorce, you will still be penalized.
• DO wait to schedule travel and vacation time until after your divorce is finalized.
  
  Courts will rarely concern themselves with your schedule, and the added anxiety of canceling or rearranging trips can be very taxing. Make yourself accessible to your spouse and your attorney, and save your vacation for a time when you're less likely to be interrupted.
• DON'T commit to any major life changes.
  
  Taking a new job or relocating to a new area can unnecessarily complicate an already complex divorce process. Unless you're presented with a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, it may be wise to postpone any ground-breaking changes until after you've reached a settlement.

How do I know if I need a lawyer?
It's almost always a good idea to have an attorney at hand to help you through the divorce process. However, if your divorce is uncontested, you can take the do-it-yourself route and get your divorce online.

A contested divorce is more complicated, and if you have children and custody issues to work through, a lawyer is a must. Qualified divorce lawyers are available throughout the United States to assist you. Click here to Find a Divorce Lawyer.